New stuff

Luke

So, major stuff going on- Luke is on the move!! Not full-out crawling, mind you, but a sort of army crawl/scoot/launch forward for a single snack, then push to sitting, eat aforementioned snack, try again, get frustrated that the push to sitting actually placed you farther back from the 2nd snack than you would have been had you just enjoyed the snack on your tummy and moved on from there. Oh well. We'll take what we can get- any forward progress is progress! :) Luke is also trying to pull up a lot! I cannot tell you how pleased with himself he is. New baby. Seriously. He is willing to experiment more because he can push straight to sitting quickly and not get stuck. It's great. He has been precious- LOVE watching him learn new things!!

Rebekah

As for other new things, I have a meeting next week for Rebekah's "nursery." I will review our situation: Rebekah will be 3 next month. At that age, Scotland offers a free position at a "nursery"- a public preschool. (At age 4, she is entitled to a free position.) I applied for the 3 yr old position, hoping she wouldn't get it so I wouldn't have to decide. You see, it's 1) public, 2) 5 days a week, 3) in place of a nap, 4) free, 5) unknown. I am not opposed to public school at all- honestly. I am just unsure of how the system works here (hence the meeting I suppose) and this city/country is very liberal in morality...not sure how much that permeates a 3 tear old class room.

The good news is that the class is play-based, which Josh and I are proponents of (for a good read, try "Power of Play" and "Einstein didn't use flash cards." As the titles suggest, these books argue for a play-based learning context, rather than pushing school too early. They cite Europe who does play-based, versus the UK who doesn't in general, and the results are that Euopean kids are more prepared for school and do better than UK kids. I guess it's the idea of making muffins and talking about ingredients (chemistry) and connecting that 3 muffins in this direction and 3 muffins in that direction are 6 muffins (math), etc. So, you don't skip lessons, you just contextualize them, which as a former language teacher, I resonate with).

Anyway, every time I think about it, my stomach feels sick. NO WAY am I sending my 3 year old away for 5 days. So, I will do 3 max and see what they have to say about that. It is instead of a nap (12:45-3:15), so that's good and bad. Good because I don't lose my little buddy during "our time", bad because she often needs a nap. I didn't even ask for morning b/c they're hard to get and because I didn't want her gone all morning and then asleep in the afternoon. This is also tricky because I will have to coordinate getting her there and back (a 5 minute walk from our new flat) around Luke's afternoon nap. I am confident he will be snoozing twice a day for a while, which I'm fine with. :) However, that complicate timing, etc. Such is life.

Okay- so here's the deal...I NEVER imagined that I would become so smitten with my kids that I would be this kind of mom. The kind that wants to delay school and spend as much time as possible with them. I seriously am shocked. Their childhoods are fleeting as it is, I am jealous of their time. I rarely ask Josh to take them anywhere without me because I don't want to miss out. I love them. With every part of me.

So, what's my problem? They have to go to school someday...granted not now and not for a while for little Luke. Will I be better equipped to release them later? Am I scared of what they'll be exposed to or what they'll become? Honestly, I can tell you now that I am terrified of having them out of my sight. I have left my kids with friends and family (never a hired babysitter). I have left them at church nursery (while I was still in the building), and I have left Rebekah at a creche outside my back window. I guess I have never left them with "strangers" in a strange land with strange views on things.

Here's what makes me cry (even as i type): Josh aside, no one will love my little girl the way I do. No one knows what's she's thinking as she's thinking it. No one thinks her every move is precious the way I do. No one will defend her with their lives the way I would. No one would run back in a burning building for her the way I would. No one will nurture her mind, heart, and sould the way I try.

I was a teacher- I loved my job, my subject, my school, and my students. However, I did not go home and tediously think of how to do better by them. They were students, not my children. Rebekah will be one of _______ students and she will not be special to anyone but me. I know that's normal and healthy even, but my mama bear side is uncomforatble with that.

(Before you even suggest it, I homeschooling is not an option for us. Don't even try. This is my blog and I can say good luck and thank you. :))


As for little one- Rebekah is ecstatic at the idea of school. She knows her school by name as we drive by it occasionally. She has remarked that Daddy must already be 3 since he goes to school. Also, she truly is sharp and think a classroom experience and any instruction there could only benefit her. She has LOVED her big girl Sunday school class and is excited for church every Sunday now. I suppose we can factor in her excitement level. :)

So, will you pray for us as figure out what to do?